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For children's sake, divorce may sometimes be the better choice

Anyone in Washington who has gone through a divorce would agree that it can be a difficult experience for children. In fact, a lot of research in the field of divorce has supported this idea. Many parents pay close attention to research findings and although their marriage may not be happy, they decide to remain married for their children's sake. However, some experts feel that instead of bringing up children in an environment of tension and hostility between the parents, divorcing may be a better option to choose.

Without dismissing the research findings, parents should consider the various advantages that children might have if the parents decide to separate. For example, after divorce, a child can have two peaceful homes instead of one home that is not peaceful. It may be difficult for the child to accept the absence of one parent in the aftermath of the divorce but it is definitely better than watching the parents fight over everything in the same house.

Living in a peaceful environment also contributes to better emotional health. It may initially be difficult for children to adjust to the new situation that develops after the divorce. However, once the new routine and new life is established, life becomes more peaceful and children start to adapt to that and thrive with the new-found peace around them. The incentive for the children in that case is the parent's happiness.

After divorce, when children see that their parents are cooperating with each other when it comes to child custody and visitation arrangements, they understand that cooperation and compromise are good in many situations and in the process, which they carry those values with them their entire lives. It is also possible that after separation, when parents are free from the tensions of marital discord, their parenting skills improve, which contributes positively to a healthy and emotionally stable upbringing for their children.

This kind of cooperation and its good effects can begin during the divorce process itself. Mediation and other methods of collaborative divorce can help reduce the level of conflict and distrust that goes on in so many divorces. Indeed, a collaborative divorce can be quicker and less expensive than courtroom litigation and can lead to better results. When parents are able reach an amicable conclusion to their marriage, they help not only their children, but themselves as well.

Source: Huffington Post, "Why a Good Divorce Is Better Than a Bad Marriage for Kids," Brette Sember, March 24, 2015

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